Ladies and gentlemen, boys & girls, children of all ages! Come and see the greatest show on earth! Tonight, in the center ring, I bring you a sight sure to amaze you, dazzle your senses, and leave you speechless in wonderment! Sadly, I cannot claim to be the discoverer of such a magnificent spectacle, but I would be remiss, nay criminal even, if I did not share with you these things. So, fair audience, prepare to be amazed, prepare to click the link, prepare for MAGIC!
has brought to us a glorious pageant of color and texture! Behold the link above and click! You will be transported to a land of fantasy beyond your wildest imaginings, for this is only a taste of the marvels you will find!
What's more, dear people, you can own them for yourselves! Who can hold the stars in their hands? Who can catch lightning in jar? Who, I ask you, can lasso the wind like a wild steed? YOU! My friends, when you gird your loins with such majesty!
"Schuyler Ellers, who runs the Lord von Schmitt Etsy shop, creates dazzlingly colorful patterned crochet shorts out of recycled materials that are sure to please both the wearer and their stunned beholders (man or woman)." Davos of Bored Panda
Don't believe me for my words those of you who gather here! Believe your own eyes, even if what you behold is UNBELIEVABLE!