Thursday, March 17, 2011

They're Magically Delicious!

Top o' the mornin' to ya! Faith and begorrah!  Give me back my lucky charms! Uh... kiss me blarney stone? Yeah, those are legit. I'm sure of it, totally Irish phrases that the Irish say ALL the time. Well, maybe not. Anyway, regardless of the fact that most self-respecting Irish folk would probably never say any of those things, I still want to wish everyone out there a...

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Today, at least in America, everyone is Irish. It doesn't matter where you come from, what you do, what color you are... Erin Go Bragh is the theme! Well, that and beer, loads of it, tinted green and swilled like prohibition starts tomorrow. Whether you're knocking back a pint or just pinning on your "kiss me I'm Irish" button, I hope you're having a good one. Me? I'm wearing too many shades of mismatched green, made an "end of the rainbow" cake last night, have some corned beef and cabbage cooking away in the crockpot at home, and an internet full of St. Paddy's Day sweetness right here... 

"Me gran knitted up this jumper an' cap for me. Ma told me I had to wear it to school, first day no less! Asked if she was coddin' me. Said no, she did! I told her that's Arthur Guinness talkin'. Said I weren't a babby no more, an I'd end up gettin' in a row for sure. 'Course she paid me no mind, just handed me a pint of plain for lunch, smacked me bum an' told me to get to school. Kids ain't laid off me since, 'course I bunk off most days now..."

(Dear Irish people, I'm sorry.)

Whoa... someone's been hitting the Lucky Charms pretty hard. He's looking a little frosted himself. 

This is Eoin Morgan, an Irishman, and famous Cricketer playing for England. But once, he was just some goofy kid in a shamrock sweater, and too big shirt.

I'm fascinated by that dog portrait. What is it doing there? Does it come with the sweater? Is it an Irish dog? I mean, the sweater's nice enough, a lovely sprinkling of shamrocks across the chest and all, but Mad Eye Moody (I've named him!) up there really takes center stage.

"IRISH" ... you know, in case you forget.

Because people on acid like St. Patrick's day too! Those colors... it's like it's vibrating right off the screen. Not to mention the background. I bet if you stare at it long enough, you can see through time.

Now, all fun and games aside... everyone be responsible tonight when you belt up to the bar for a pint of green beer. Don't let it go to your (wait for it) head...
Seriously, don't drink and drive... call a cab, or find a nice corner where you can vomit and quietly pass out for the night. We'll all thank you... and probably draw on you with Sharpies. Just sayin'.

I suppose that's all for now. Perhaps next time I'll do a bit on the beautiful sweaters that the craftsmen in Ireland do produce, you know... to make up for this one. But, for now, I'm just going to keep with the theme of slightly insulting, hopefully humorous posting. So, in closing, here's a traditional Irish blessing that I completely made up just a minute ago:

 May all your charms be lucky...

 Green, your Guinness beer...

Your kisses, always Irish...

and your heart forever here!

Happy St. Patrick's Day!